June 14, 2011

invert the rules

I accidentally heard Rush Limbaugh say the other day that "women don't like Sarah Palin because she's a 10," and I wasn't sure whether to laugh, cry, or curse. I did curse, then laugh, at his stupidity, but I've thought about it several times since then, because it really bothered me. I don't think women dislike Caribou Barbie because she's attractive, I think it's because she's just stupid enough  - and just smart enough - to be dangerous.

The sad truth, though, is that women often do judge each other  - and often harshly - on appearance, specifically size, but even worse is how we judge ourselves(Men judge us on appearance, too, but that's for another discussion.)  Who among doesn't know on a gut level that attractive = thin + young. I mean, sure, we all "know better," and I think most of us are wise enough to recognize a wide range what's "attractive" in the world of women. 


How many of us are dieting right now? How many of us have a body part - or a body - that we hate? How many of us avoid full length mirrors, or feel uncomfortable naked in front of our partners? How many of us hate clothes shopping, and even getting dressed, because "nothing fits" or "looks right"? How many of us judge our clothes first not by how much we like the fabric, color, details, the way it feels on our skin, but by to what degree it makes us "look fat"? How many of us have given up on ever having a body we like, much less love, and so have given up on wearing clothes we love, too? If it fits, we'll wear it, and if we don't like it, or the way we feel in it, we'll say we "don't care about clothes, anyway."

Well, ladies, here's what I say about all that:

FUCK. THAT. SHIT. I'm not playing that game any more. 

We are beautiful. Whether we're stick straight or mega-curvy or anywhere at all in between, we are all beautiful, and we all deserve to feel good about the bodies we inhabit, and the clothes with which we adorn it.

"Good enough" ISN'T good enough! Not for me, and not for you, and not for our daughters, either...

While we're at it, lets's ditch these labels, because they just make us feel bad - let's stop saying them about ourselves, and about each other. NO MORE:

     beefy, bigblimp, bovine, brawny, broadbulging, bulkybutterball, chubby, chunky,  
     corpulentdistended, dumpy, fat, gargantuan heavy, heftyhusky, jelly-belly, lard-ass,              
     meaty, obeseoversize, overweight, ponderous,  portly, potbellied, pudgy, roly-poly, 
     rotund, stoutswollenthick

We are NOT cows, pigs, hippos, whales, or elephants.

We are beautiful women.

I've looked at hundreds and hundreds of images of "plus size" women, and at some point I stopped seeing them as "big women," and they began to register as just women.

Look (and if you want more, there are links at the bottom):


FYI: every one of these women are US size 14 or over.  If you want to retrain your mind, or just want to see more pictures of beautiful women who are at least the size of the average American woman, check out these links:

"The best way to deal with any manner of size-negative fashion advice is always to invert the rules, and do the opposite. Ergo, here is some size-positive fashion advice, Mode style:
  • Reveal your shape.
  • Flaunt your figure.
  • Show off your assets.
  • Uncover your beauty.
  • Emphasize your body.
  • Embrace your femininity.
  • Don't be invisible. Get noticed."

from: judgmentofparis.com


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boops said...

in the immortal words of Judge Judy: Beauty fades, stupid lasts forever. You hear me Rush?

helle said...

Such an important issue, you´ve said it all Susan!...blessings Helle

Anonymous said...

Thanks for this Susan! -KS


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